Question

If you can answer this question correctly I will owe you a diet coke:
What do they grow at the volunteer farm?

hint: the answer is not potatoes...though some would argue.

Good Stuff Cheap

This blog is ingeniously named "Clearance." (Very nice, Halie. Very nice.)

Let me give you a little background. There's this little store, you may have heard of it, called Target. It really is a beautiful place - full of happy clothes, fun shoes, and very well appointed housewares.

Halie and I used to meet at Target once a week - at the little table in the inside window of the cafe that is no longer there. We would meet, talk, eat bread sticks, and drink diet coke. Eventually, we would refill our diet cokes and implement Laura's Clearance Shopping Strategy (aka The Art of Getting Good Stuff Cheap).

Shopping for clearance is not for the faint of heart. There is a method that must be followed, otherwise you will likely miss something great. And so I present to you the finer points of clearance shopping at Target.

1. Avoid the main aisles. Good clearance finds don't happen in highly visible areas. You may find "Price Cuts" here, but do not be confused: this is not clearance. Walk the inside aisles. Start in stationary and move down towards housewares, walking between the perpendicular aisles and the store divider. There are often good finds here. Also located on these back shelves, you are likely to find fun non-clearance items that aren't quite good enough for the major aisles. (Dancing robotic hip-hop turtles and hamsters for instance.)
2. Look for the color red. All Target clearance is marked with the color red. It is either under a large red sign on an endcap(cleverly enough labeled "clearance"), marked with a small red cardboard sign on an individual aisle, or priced with a red clearance sticker. As you increase your clearance shopping, you'll naturally develop a radar for clearance indicators.
3. Leave no back aisle unwalked. Think you will only find home decor clearance near the home decor section? Think again. Wondering if that pink yoga bag ever went on clearance and why it is not with the exercise equipment clearance? Oh, it did go on clearance and it is with the electronic clearance instead. Clearance shopping takes time people. Be diligent.
4. 30% off is not the end. Let's be honest: you don't go clearance shopping for things you absolutely need (see point #5 for exceptions to this rule). You go clearance shopping to see if there are things you might need that you didn't know you needed until they were suddenly cheaper. For instance, a porcelain butter dish or stationary with your first initial on it (it could be your last initial as well, depending on what's available. Options available with regular priced items are diminished when clearance shopping). So, when you see that thing that you suddenly realize you need because it's 30% off - hold out. You'll probably need it (and appreciate it) more when it's 50 to 75% off. And there's a good chance it will get there. Hold out, friends, for the continued mark-down.
5. Know when to shop clearance for things that you do (actually in real life) need. There are certain times of the year when certain types of things go on clearance. For instance, sheets. Target usually cycles out their bedding section twice a year - once in the late fall and once in the late spring. Don't buy sheets until these times! Otherwise you'll come across those sheets for which you paid full price for at least 30% cheaper. Also, if you aren't particular about brands, clearance shopping for hygiene needs is a viable options. When companies run specials (two deodorants for the price of one or Listerine that comes with a travel size bottle as a bonus), they are only meant to be on the shelf for a certain period of time. After that, clearance! I recently got 3 tubes of ADA recommended Crest toothpaste for 3 dollars. Ba-da-bing!
6. Shopping for clearance clothes is meant for a different day. Approximately 78% of my wardrobe is from Target clearance (and that includes socks and undies). But beware! If you try to shop regular clearance items and clothing clearance all in the same day, you are in for about 3 hours in Target. I recommend checking the clearance items once every week or so (just to stay up to date), and planning a special clearance clothes shopping trip once a month and definitely at the ends of season. It takes time to go through every piece of clothing on every rack, but this is absolutely necessary to come away with good finds!

Hopefully this will help you in your quest for clearance. And remember, it helps to take a good friend along who can remind you that you don't actually need that pack of scrapbook paper just because it's $3.00 cheaper than normal.

Especially when you don't even scrapbook.

Boone in Spring

Sanctuary

A sanctuary, as described so eloquently by dictionary.com, is immunity afforded by refuge in such a place. Where do you find sanctuary? I have found bathrooms to be some of the best sanctuaries. As strange as it sounds, and even to me it seems strange; I have always been fond of the safety and solitude of being in the bathroom. And its funny because we do spend extended periods of time in bathrooms so we get to know them well and I have discovered I know so many details of the showers, the stalls, the mirrors, and the sinks I have encountered. I have some favorites:

1. my home bathroom. The one on the first floor. The one everyone in my family would race toward and fight over after every Sunday lunch. The one which my brother and I used to pick the lock with a butter knife when we were kids when mom was in there too long...just to make her mad. I know the black and white tile that lines the walls and the cracked mirror that disguises the medicine cabinet and I know that the lights flicker 2 times before beaming a continuous light. I came to this particular sanctuary when I was yelled at or in distress about something. it was a good place to take a bath...in our retro green bathtub. Sylvia Plath wrote "There must be quite a few things a hot bath wont cure, but I don't know many of them. Whenever I'm sad I'm going to die, or so nervous I can't sleep, or in love with somebody I won't be seeing for a week, I slump down just so far and then I say 'I'll go take a hot bath.'"

2. the bathroom in the Rankin Science building (ASU). I know this one seems random, but I have taken shelter in this bathroom before and after some of the most traumatic tests I have ever taken. Not just that, but the cold tap water has been a great friend of mine on early 8 o'clock mornings when I needed to wake up. This bathroom is one of those gross bathrooms with green mildewy concrete walls and stalls made out of something resembling painted plywood. Its ugly and subtle and that's why I like it. I feel safe there. safe from the grips of grades and haunting questions about photosynthesis and the lymphatic system.

3. the bathroom in this bagel shop in Harrisonburg-Mr.J's. People who have been to this place can only wonder how I could turn this bathroom into a sanctuary, but hear me out. I used to have Bible study on Tuesday mornings and then afterward I would go to sit in the bagel shop, get some breakfast and think and write. I liked this bathroom because it was secluded, only one stall, and I was usually so tired when I went to Mr.J's that I would go straight to the bathroom sit down and flop over like a cloth doll and just stay like that until I felt like I could move again. bathrooms are safe places for resting in public places.

4. the bathroom on my dorm hall. Why? because its clean and pink and sturdy and all tile. This bathroom is consistent (as are most bathrooms) and it is always there when I wake up to shower and when I get ready to go to bed and I need to brush my teeth. I suppose I find real sanctuary in the shower. In college there aren't many places where you can be alone, but the shower IS one of those few places. and I can pray or dance or sing softly (not that I do these things when no one is looking, but hypothetically). I'm safe there in that shower. that sanctuary of sorts.

Thats all for now. moral of the post: sanctuaries aren't only in churches. Though they are nice too.

Are there male prostitutes in your temple?

This weekend was in short, amazing. Really. This weekend, I* took my high school students to Head Waters Lodge in Highland County for our spring BreakAway retreat.

So, Head Waters is a great place. If you ever get the chance to go, take it. One great thing about doing retreats there is that I don't actually have to plan or lead. I get to hang out with students, worship, and listen to other people give Bible lessons. It's brilliant.

This weekend, we studied a couple passages in 1 and 2 Kings. Raise your hand if you've spent a lot of time personally studying 1 and 2 Kings. Yeah, me neither. Sure, I've perused these books at best, most notably when I'm skipping back to get to 1 and 2 Samuel where we find the amazing adventures of David (future blog post: Who would you cast in what could possibly be the most epic movie ever about the life of David? Eric Bana as David? Or is that too obvious?)

Mostly we talked about Elijah in the evenings and Josiah in the mornings. Right now, I want to talk about Josiah. Now, I knew there was a Josiah in the Bible. Mainly because (A) I know for a fact that there exists a man named Josiah Weaver and (B) the Weaver's have Biblical names that start with the letter J.

Here's some background on Josiah (not Weaver):

• He became king at age 8 when his father, Amon, fell to assassins at age 24.
• When he was 16, he began to seek the Lord (this was a big deal - it had been a while since any king remembered what the Lord had done for David. During this time Jerusalem and the Israelites were behaving very badly. Bad, Israel, bad.)
• When he was 26, he decided to repair the temple of the Lord. While this was happening, the high priest found the Book of the Law.

This is where it gets interesting - Josiah had already been seeking the Lord, so finding the Book of the Law was a big deal. Josiah was now able to get some clear direction about what the Lord expected from his people.

When the king heard the words of the Book of the Law, he tore his robes. He gave these orders..."Go and inquire of the Lord for me and for the people and for all Judah about what is written in this book that has been found. Great is the Lord's anger that burns against us because our fathers have not obeyed the words of this book; they have not acted in accordance with all that is written there concerning us." 2 Kings 22:11-13

Three sidebars:

1. When we truly allow the Word to infiltrate our hearts, we see how incredibly off base we are.
2. When we truly allow the Word to infiltrate our hearts, we see how incredibly off base our culture is.
3. The longer we spend away from the Word, the worse we get.

Here is what is supercool about Josiah - he took action. First, he started to seek the Lord. Second, he decided to repair the temple. When he heard the Law, he started to take action. He started to make changes. He cleared the temple.

The king ordered...the high priest, the priests next in rank and the doorkeepers to remove from the temple of the Lord all the articles made for Baal and Asherah and all the starry hosts...He did away with the pagan priests...He took down the Asherah pole from the temple of the Lord...He also tore down the quarters of the male shrine prostitutes, which were in the temple of the Lord. 2 Kings 23: 4-7.

We read this and think "whoa that's bad. Prostitutes doing business in the temple. Yikes. Stuff made for other gods in the temple? Geesh. That would never happen at my church."

Oh really?

Sure, we may not have such extremes going on in our own churches and more importantly in our own hearts. But we aren't far off base. When we allow ourselves to drift away from the Lord and from his Word, we let other stuff creep in. The male prostitutes probably didn't just up and move into the temple one day. They probably just got closer and closer and, before you know it, had set up shop there.

There's a song by Randall Goodgame that I love. The chorus goes like this:

I am Jerusalem/I am the temple of the Lord/Holy of Holies/The Lord dwells within

So what immorality is going on in your temple? What shrines to other gods are set up and fully functional?

It may be time to follow in King Josiah's footsteps and clear the temple.

(*For those who don't know who I am, Hi. I'm Laura, also known as the girl Halie graciously shares this blog with, also known as the youth director at First Presbyterian Church in Harrisonburg, VA, also known as Mallie's** mom.)

(**For those of you who don't know who Mallie is, she's my superdog.)